Are you as excited as I am? That's right it's finally here--. If you've been a good patriot this year, paid your taxes on time and belong to a cult that does smart things like make you pretend you're eating your savior's body and drinking his blood instead of stupid cult stuff like praying in a certain direction 5 times a day; then maybe, just maybe, this year Uncle Sam will slip down your chimney and leave presents under your flagpole. Be sure to set out a plate of apple pie for him and throw down some birdseed for the eight bald eagles pulling his Humvee. Thomas Jefferson bless us everyone!
As always, porkjerky.com goes dark for 9/11 so get your fill now.

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R.I.P.->Honoring Cheyenne Obrock With Crap

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Don't Take My Word For It.
Here Are My Sources For
Cheyenne Obrock

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Cheyenne Obrock was on this earth for 7 years. Now before you get all tearied eyed and start belly aching about how short her life was, lets look at this objectively. Or better yet, comparitively.

Her life was 233% percent as long as the sentence her killer got. See, it doesn't seem that short now does it. I bet Diana L. McClelland, thinks 7 years is a really long time. Especially when you have to go that long without your daily diet of painkillers, sedatives and muscle relaxants.

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Have your attorney use jason@porkjerky.com when making good on your threats to sue me for being an asshole. Of course, the same guy who handled your back child support and DUI cases probably isn't the best representation in this civil matter.