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R.I.P.->Honoring Tom Vanhee And Erin Grabowski With Crap

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Don't Take My Word For It.
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Tom Vanhee And Erin Grabowski
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Memorial For Tom Vanhee And Erin Grabowski

Where's some plagarism when you need it? This is why the small-town newspaper is becoming extinct, taken over by the news conglomeration that repackages the same story to 18 different outlets. You'll see sister TV stations sharing the same 2 minute news segment, or read the same newspaper story in 3 different and pseudo-seperate publications because they all have the same parent company. If'n yous got yourself an amplitude modulation receiver you'll even hear the same story on different stations there.

News is now a commodity--its cheaper to make one version and sell it in different places. The upside to all this news media consolidation is that if they get it wrong, they consistently get it wrong in all 18 different outlets its being distributed to. There's no need to check one version of the story to another or dig deeper to find the source--they're all the same story and its going to be wrong in the same manner so you'll never spot the innaccuracies.

Not with small town shitty news papers though. When discrepancies arise between outlets its almost impossible to tell which one is right.

This story could be awesome, but with all the conflicting reports of it, I have no idea who to blame for it, nor do I know if this crash happened during prime-time or around closing time. I found 3 articles about this accident, all contradicting certain facts of the others. They all agree that Tom Vanhee, Erin Grabowski and Michael Williams died after crossing the median and hitting an 18 wheeler during a snowstorm while heading east on 1/28/2000.

The first article I found said Erin was driving and the accident happened at 8pm. The second article I found said Michael was driving at 2am. The third article doesn't say who was driving and it happened at 8pm. The high ethical standards I adhere to while creating this noble site preclude me from pointing any fingers. Of course I can still raise my eyebrows and make eye movements toward Michael Williams, by confirming, with my own impeccable journalistic credibility, that there were only 2 crosses--one for Tom Vanhee and one for Erin Grabowski.

Again, not pointing fingers. Well except at shitty Mid-Missouri Newspapers who really need to get their acts together.

I know what you are thinking and you couldn't be more right. Someone needs to e-mail me at jason@porkjerky.com and tell me how little my dick is and how horribly I need to die.