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Brett Allen Hern: Not The Smartest Turd In The Urinal
Honestly people, when a loved one dies you can lie to yourself all you want about the deceased. You can gawdily memorialize them with
all the plastic flowers and crappy cliched wreaths you want. You can even adopt a highway in their loving memory; which seems to mean a
memory where you forget about them being a universe class dumbfuck. You can do all of that. Its not fine with me, but I have come to accept
that its going to happen. Just know, that when I post pages to their honest memory it is because your publicity of them lead me to find the truth
about how your retarded loved one died. These pages are your fault.
With a preface like that, you fucking know that this cross has one cunt of a good story behind it:
If you take the stupidity of Pete Cuezze to the 5th power then add 3 retards, mix
in some brain damage and lobotomize on high for 30 seconds, you might get the intelligence of
Brett Allen Hern. I usually give a synopsis of the stories I find to tell the story of
how the crosses got there, but this time I am copying verbatim from the newspaper
article I found:
"Brett Hern, an 18-year-old Independence man, ran out in front of a tractor-trailer after parking his pickup truck on the
shoulder of Interstate 70 at about 7:30 p.m."
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There I was, titty fucking some random skank's nipples off, wondering if that was enough or if I needed to do something else completely pointless for breast cancer. If only there was a gesture equally as empty as wearing a pink bracelet or having a bake sale or throwing a magnetic ribbon on my car or walking with a herd of heifers for 5 kilometers. Something that would show my hollow support without taking any actual effort nor furthering the cause in any real way. Then it hit me like a ton of boobs. This and every October, porkjerky.com will go pink as a lip service tribute to breast cancer. Please follow my magnanimous example and do something meaninglessly worthless that doesn't require any real effort on your part for this great cause. Believe me when I say, it should be the least we can do.