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R.I.P.->Eulogizing Jason With Litter

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Memorial For Jason

A lot of people wish death by car accident upon me because of this site. Well let me tell you witty, insensitive, unoriginal pricks something, the jokes on you. I'm prepared. I've stolen like 5 "Jason" crosses from my pics, along with a ton of plastic flowers, I've picked a peck of pinwheels and have a pile of american flags so huge it would make George Washington puke on Abraham Lincoln's tits.

So bring on the motherfucking karma, I'm ready. Mine is going to be the biggest tastelessest, plasticky memorial ever. I'm getting into heaven or reincarnated as a cow for sure.

Oh, and Irony; you can suck my dick. And I have an asshole for you to lick Poetic Justice.

Have your attorney use jason@porkjerky.com when making good on your threats to sue me for being an asshole. Of course, the same guy who handled your back child support and DUI cases probably isn't the best representation in this civil matter.