porkjerky plogPathetic Revenge Made Easy
This is why the internet rocks my balls off. No longer do you have to go through the trouble of owning or taking by gunpoint a mass media outlet if you want to smear someone’s name. Our lives have become so efficient, so advanced that within seconds, from our own homes, we can take our […]
Award Winning Worthlessness
I’ve explained the Stay Puff Marshmallow Man Shitty Blog Theory before: if you can imagine a shitty blog—it’s already been created. Here’s a quick example off the top of my head: a blog about vegan pets. It’s so shitty I am certain something like it exists. And 15 seconds later, I found that it does: […]
I Got Your Voir Dire Right Here
Oh thank you Al Gore. Ambulance chasing has entered the 21st century. Not with a whimper but with a blog. You can’t fart without hearing an ad for a parasitic attorney. They’re everywhere: telephone book covers, bus benches, every other ad during daytime T.V., all over the not-so-local alternative newsweekly that’s owned by a billion […]
Blog Fraud
Just because you’re a blog doesn’t mean you can get away with such outright misleading of people. What a fucking rip off. I have a good mind to contact the FCC about this blatant fraud. At first I thought I had finally found a community of like minded individuals. A place where I get stay […]
Psychic Rotisserie Chicken
This shouldn’t come as a surprise to them. The Porkjerky.com Shitty Blog Award Number Something Or Other goes to the Free Psychic Sight Blog. What a shitty fucking blog. First and foremost its not really a blog, but a fucking spam garden. As in the site exists solely to sell something—psychic readings. Every post has […]
The Null Blog
Oh Sweet Lord Almighty Fuck. I did it, I finally found a blog better than the one post wonders who have had the glorious distinction of winning a Porkjerky.com Intermittently Bestowed Shitty Blog Award. What could be more shittier than a blog that someone took the time to set up, make only one post and […]
Masters Of Shitty Blog Administration
You got assholes in with my douchebags. No, you got douchebags in with my assholes. Its bad and then worse, all at the same time. Like puking all over yourself. Like nails on a chalkboard while you are chewing on tinfoil. Like the doctor accidentally crushing your nuts during your rectal exam. Like dating a […]
Many Super Happy Respects Upon Your Blog
Is there anyone sadder, more pitiful than motivational speakers? I use both of those adjectives in their literal senses with no mocking intention at all. That will come later. Sad as in the, ‘I am going to cry because I am unhappy’ way. Do truly happy people devote that much of their lives trying to […]
Here’s What Else You Get – Shit
Good news, you can own your own Porkjerky.com Erratically Awarded Shitty Blog Award winning site. Today’s prize-getter is for sale. That’s actually how I found it. As I was sitting at the computer splattered in my own semen and fingers smelling of poo, inspiration struck. I wondered if any fuck was retarded enough to sell […]
Prima Facie Shitty Blog
Twitter has a blog. Thats like finding out the skanky girl in high school who you hated because she was such a bitch turned out to be an anal porn star who flaunts and lords her misachieved popularity over people who are disgusted by it. Technically its not changed anything, you just feel a little […]
