Coach’s Corner

Team Porkjerky.com Shitters Dear lord, we ask that you watch over everyone shitting today. Please save us all from anal fissures, rectal tears, prolapsed ani and any other injury that the devil will try to throw at us. For your glory we crap. Amen. Now lets get out there and put on a shitting clinic. […]

Opening Day

Message to the Team Porkjerky.com Shitters (you know who you are): Oh yeah, it’s a good day to be pounding some porcelain. Let’s put in a good workout today team. I know I know, I like to jump ass first onto the toilet like everyone else, but we need to properly warm up. I don’t […]

My ability to aggrandize my importance through ostentatiously pretentious vocabulary while conveying vacuous ideas can be surmised from this self-referencing, self-fulfilling sentence which utilizes words like 'utilizes' and 'behoove' to behoove my demonstration of my ability to convey vacuous ideas with ostentatiously pretentious vocabulary.