The Turd’s Prayer

Dear lord in heaven, Creator of all, provider of everything, giver of life and with whom I shall spend eternal bliss, I ask you to please hear my prayer today and allow this enormous turd to finally exit this vessel of a body that you have been kind of enough to bless me with. Oh […]

Please stop judging me so harshly for being an incompassionate asshole. Put yourself in my shoes--how would you like it if you couldn't empathize?