porkjerky plogYou’re A Dumbshit
Celebrity Scat
Even with the economy in the shitter. Even with the inability to verify it. Even with the laws against it and the policies prohibiting it. I am certain people would figuratively eat up celebritys’ literal shit. You’re telling me some fat bitch in Ottumwa, IA who reads Us Weekly while watching QVC all day when […]
Anusplasty
Oh hot fudge covered shit sundae, I love the healthcare system in America. Oh sure, people complain about the unimportant, minor aspects of our system—it costs too much, it’s too beaureacratic, it’s hard to find a good doctor, they don’t spend enough time with the patients, blah blah blah. What a bunch of grade A, […]
Socioshitology
In some cultures the shape, size and smell of ones crap determines the status of an individual within their society. In some other societies you can make up random shit about shit and stupid fucks will not only believe it but probably recite it as fact to others. Which society is truly more advanced? It’s […]
Raising Awareness That You’re A Dumbshit
I decided to do something special with today’s turd. I wanted to give back to the community. To affect a positive change on society for once and not just crack poop jokes. So today, I put wristbands around my turds to serve as a reminder and to bring awareness about a cause that is very […]
Pop Culture Pedophilia
Initially this was going to be about how engrossed our culture is with shit. But then it took a horribly awesome, wrong turn. A few posts back I detailed all the various words and phrases we have in America for shit, ass and anus. Amazing. Within 4 minutes of starting I had 20 words for […]
Life’s Crappy Theater
I will beat the sight out of the next deaf motherfucker who wants me to buy some crappy flower because he thinks his deaf ass can’t work. Then they will experience a real handicap. Today was like the 3rd time that’s happened to me—and with a different mute each time. I am eating lunch and […]
Illogical Logic
As I was pounding out today’s loaf, I looked down and realized that my cock is an excellent case study in the sheer awesomeness of our government. First and foremost, I am not one of those idiots who think of myself a genius because I can point out logical flaws in the application of our […]
Scary Shit
You know what scares the shit out of me? What keeps me up at night? The thing that wakes me up in a cold sweat? Its dying in the most horrible way imaginable: getting hit by a train. Oh man, that’s some scary shit. That has got to be the worst way to go. Drowning, […]
Shitstorm A Coming
Wait just a second. Nope, not yet. Not yet. Just a few moments more. Let’s fully digest this. Almost there, getting closer. Hold on just a little longer. Oh ok, here it comes. I think we are starting to understand the full gravity of this situation. And its not pretty. Let’s take just a second […]
Single Mother=Shitty Fucker
Continuing on from yesterday’s theme and tomorrow’s holiday… You know who I feel bad for this time of year—single mothers. Have you ever meet one? If your not sure the answer is no—because those cunts are proud of the term and drop it every chance they get. Never have I been in a situation that […]
