porkjerky plogMetafeces
The Calculus Of Really Fucking Disgusting
Here’s a deeply philosophical question that I don’t think has ever been posed and you might not like the answer to: How much more money would you want to eat a turd from someone else than one of your own? Now let’s jump past the holier than thou part of this discussion where I have […]
Art De Mon Derriere
I use public restrooms to show my wit Poems, drawings, etchings done as I sit. I think its art Straight from my heart Especially the landscapes, done with shit.
Fuck Mud Pies
Who wants a peanut-filled, chocolate funnel cake?
Only You Can Prevent Fecal Incontinence
I know it can get discolored and AMA recommends you bleach it so you can retain that healthly vibrant asshole you had when you were 18, but what about its elactisicty? I mean we all heard, or started, that story in high school about the girl last prom who got fucked with the base of […]
Father Knows Best
My father, who’s full of great advice and wit; Said we’re gonna talk about love and to sit. Call me old fashioned, Maybe unpassioned; Son, true love doesn’t make you eat a girls shit.
Polyanusism
I would much rather have 5 assholes than 2 appendices. Come on that’s a no brainer. 1. An appendix is gut candy, belly dressing. It does nothing. B. Strike that, it does do something and it’s a bad thing. The only confirmed purpose it serves is to get infected and threaten your life. […]
Down Shit Creek
Where do my piss and shit go? I understand the theory: when I get around to it and flush the toilet my poop and pee snake through my house on a stream of water, through pipes and out to the sewer and then to some waste treatment center in the poor part of town. But […]
Roses And My Ass Are Red, Violets Are Blue…
I once had an awesomely hairy tush A candy binge left me straining to push A turd of gummy bears yanked all my anus hairs Thus the end of my beautiful ass-bush.
You Should Have Seen The One That Got Away
She was the length of an oarsman’s row if she was an inch I tell ye. And thick as a turret to boot. This was my Moby Dick. Holy crap. I first noticed this beast at 2 in the morning. Rumbling, tumbling, churning and convulsing. Oh, it would be fight for sure. A fight I […]
Painful Poopy Poetry
A piece of shit was once in my ass A turd I thought I would never pass scratched the length of my gut, tons of blood out my butt When did I swallow a piece of glass?
