porkjerky plogI Am A Sell Out Whore
Internet Ads For All
Well that’s why. In embracing the shitfucks of the world and starting my Blogger blog, I came to understand why everyone has ads on their blogs and thinks they can make a crapton of money from them: Because Blogger makes it simple and tells them they can. There’s no conflict of interest there. If an […]
Pop Shit
Cash me in, color me up, give me my 15 minutes so I can sell them for smokes. Compared to the fucks I found yesterday, I have been doing an absolutely horrible, quarter-assed job of selling this plog out. I feel like a hooker with a heart of gold on her period—I know there’s […]
There’s No ‘I’ In ‘Shit’
For a country so in love with bravado talk about individuality, capitalism and self-determination, we sure are a bunch of socialist, communism acting pussies. Everything is a fucking team event. Not a sport mind you, an event. School projects you get put on a team, although you’re graded individually. At work there’s all kinds of […]
It’s Unamimous, Happy Mother’s Day
No surprise here. It was quite a trouncing, that frankly, everyone saw coming. The only shocking part is that it wasn’t a shut out. By a score of 17,776 to 2, Happy Mother’s Day solidly beat bitch mother for the more popular blog post title on 5/10/2009. So, Happy Mother’s Day or in that rare […]
Fat Pieces Of Shit
This is not news to anyone, but people are generally ignorant. Myself included. There is just too much in the world to be informed of. Like knowing about what words not to end sentences with. That was pretty god damn good, but you probably missed it. Both times. And that’s fine. The truly horrible people […]
Dog Shit Capitalism
Here’s a story behind the story. Ok, everyone knows about the delicious irony of me having a blog so I can crap about how shitty blogs are. While I was trying to sell ads on this shithole plog of mine I googled/yahooed a bunch of keywords that related to it. I hoped to get ads […]
Shit I Found Beside The Road
Glory days are here again. The tow trucks have pulled away, the flares have burned out, I took another huge shit, funerals have been had, people have littered up our nations highways a little more and just put up some new roadside memorial pictures because of it all. I like to think of this shitty […]
Don’t Order Yet, Here’s What Else You’ll Get
Ok, where was I? Oh yes. Affiliate marketing sucks shit. Actually, doesn’t any type of marketing suck shit? I mean that’s it, that’s your life? Selling shit. And technically, marketing isn’t even selling shit, its ‘creating awareness’ about shit. At least sleazy salesmen talk to humans. Marketers sit in offices at computers and think of […]
Scam I Am
If the web teaches us anything, well any 2 things, they are that whatever sick fucking disgusting, morally reprehensive crime against nature makes your dick hard—someone has already been filmed/photographed doing it; and the most important thing in the world is making money. Actually, judging by my nearly 3 million google results for ‘Fat Transexual […]
Shitstorm Of A Sale
Why do I even google information about blogs? It’s like asking someone to kick me in the balls daily. In researching how to sell out a blog, I came across an idea that’s equivalent to how homeless people make money washing windshields–first do it, then harrass, pester, beg, and whine like a twat until you […]
