porkjerky plogAuthor Archive
Poop Bucks Splashdown
I think its been over 3 weeks since I brought this up, and since you’re not anywhere near being a fucking genius you probably need constant reminding so that you continue to retain this thought in that feeble brain of yours. So here it is: I’m a fucking genius. This instance of my geniusocitinessish is […]
The Turd That Wouldn’t Flush
Speaking of Snoopy and peanuts and people pouring out shitty drivel to the web, Charles Schulz’s comic was as worthless as the undigested legumes in my shit. Even from a young age I realized that there was nothing good in it. I mean, I probably, like most of the world, read over 2000 Peanuts comics […]
Web Middlemen
Fuck blogs. Seriously, fuck blogs. Sister-fucking, middlemen of the internet. Last week I found a divorce blog that was shittily written by a person you could tell thought themselves a good writer. They knew how to spell, had a big vocabulary, knew the rules of grammar and knew how to string phrases together, yet what […]
Happy Pedophile Day Eve
My my my. Why aren’t you just the scariest little ghost. And are you Spiderman? That’s a very nice costume. And you look like the prettiest little princess ever. Oh, I am sorry, my mistake. Tinkerbell, you’re the prettiest Tinkerbell ever. Happy Pedophile Day Eve. May all your hopes, dreams, wishes and fantasies be […]
When Being Right Goes Wrong
I have been born with a curse: Objectivity. For some strange reason I can listen to people who seemingly disagree on a subject, understand their positions, see how they got there and agree with everyone. Even worse, I can take into account reality and apply it. It’s really sad sometimes; I don’t know why god […]
Anorexia Explained
Epiphany about anorexics: What if it hasn’t to do with diets, Getting grossly fat, Or any of that? Maybe those crazy cunts hate taking shits
Our Collective Bipolarishness
If yesterday’s post showed us anything, it’s that people love to tell you that they love and hate stuff. No matter how hypocritical or obvious it should be. With blogs, the internet is turning into a constant stream of our collective conscious. And that’s nothing to brag about. On average, we are pretty fucking […]
Blogs’ Love-Hate Relationship With Themselves
With 100% of precincts votes tallied here are your results for phrases appearing in blogs. I am both dissappointed and disinterested. I hate… I love… myspace 214,405 111,227 facebook 64,768 83,346 livejournal 47,721 169,566 twitter 18,119 92,499 blogs 102,622 85,243 blogging 57,826 335,999 the internet 533,210 1,829,471 And remember, if you didn’t blog, […]
Picture This, Everyone Else Has
By my count, including this blog and the image I use for invalid pages for this site, I have added 259 pictures of shit to the internet. And that piece of shit high school English teacher said I’d never contribute anything to society. He’s looking pretty stupid right about now. 259 images of my shit–Quite […]
Divorce Week Denouement
There are just way to many divorce blogs to point and laugh at in a week. I like to think that the next Lorenna Bobbit, Nicole Simpson, Lacy Peterson or even Brin Hartman is out there right now spilling her guts to the internet ether about how her marriage is falling or has fallen to […]
