Fat Chicks, Big Tits

There are three types of fat chicks with huge tits in this world.

You’ve got the boring, ‘I’m a fat chick with huge tits, big deal’ chicks, the ‘I’m a huge fat bitch but if I hide my gargantuan hooters behind a sports bra, a loose bloose, a huge sweater and then hunch over with a scowl no one will notice I am a huge fat chick’ chicks and lastly the ‘I’m a fat ugly whore but if I push my tits up to my lower lip with a Triple G wonderbra and show 2 meters of cleavage people won’t notice I’m a fat and ugly chick’ chicks.

Fat Chicks, Big Tits

By far, the big-busted girls who have come to grips with their big bustedness are the worst. No daddy issues. No, ‘everyone teased me from the age of 9 because of my gazoombas and I hate when guys look at my tits’. No getting mad because your eyes briefly paused at her huge tits. No getting mad because your eyes just briefly paused at her huge tits. None of any of that stuff that make the other two types of fat chicks with huge tits fun. Just a girl with big tits who’s pretty ok with them. She won’t get mad when you look at them, but she’s not putting them on display.

Today, I saw both of the fun kinds. First, on my way to lunch, I passed a lady with sweater cows the size of my ass and she was doing her damnedest to hide them. She was walking behind her friends, hunching forward a little and had her left arm stretching across her chest to grab the right side of her unnecessary sweater to keep it unnecessarily closed across her chest. Beneath that she had on a loose blouse that did a pretty ok job of concealing the huge mounds on her chest. And they were huge. Not the stick out a mile from her body huge, the basketball smashed in a vise huge. She had on some sort of bra that pushed them not up, but in.

The best part was we made eye contact. From that I knew she knew I knew her secret and she quickly drew that sweater across her chest a little more, shortened the distance between her and her friends and hunched forward a little more in the hopes that I wouldn’t realize the reason why her tits were so huge was because she was so fat.

Good luck with that, Tubby.

On my way back from lunch I saw the girl who’s big tits are her life. Ugly as fuck, fat to match and didn’t give a shit. Her tits rounded the corner 2 minutes before the rest of her made it. She wasn’t as modest as big tittied fatty #1. She wore some sort of bustier that barely covered her nipples and pushed her tits up past her neck.

That bustier wasn’t her undergarment, it was her garment.

Technically, since they were helping to hide her double and triple chins she too was hiding her fatness, but that was just a byproduct of her misguided pride in her tits. She’s they type girl who if you were looking directly in the eyes while talking to her, she would stop you mid-sentence and remind you that her tits are down there.

And stare I did. I have a policy: no matter how fat, ugly, unattractive, psycho or masectomied you are, when you dress like a hoochie I stare and stare hard. Its the least I can do. When a girl goes through all the trouble to tramp herself up and go out into public to put herself on display I do the polite thing and oblige her.

Tune in next time when I enumerate the types of non-fat, big tittied chicks in this world. My favorite is the ‘La la la la, I don’t have big tits la la la I don’t have big tits, La la la I can’t hear you’ chick.

No one gives a fourth of a cum covered turd what you think, but please don't let that stop you from spreading your insightful wit to the world by commenting below. Or fuck, you're such a pussy-eating faggot you're probably interested in the rss feed of this shitty site. Oy vey.

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In some cultures a boy isn't a man until he decapitates and abdomen-rapes his first hooker. Think about that, and decide for yourself if our society is really that advanced.