Scam I Am

If the web teaches us anything, well any 2 things, they are that whatever sick fucking disgusting, morally reprehensive crime against nature makes your dick hard—someone has already been filmed/photographed doing it; and the most important thing in the world is making money. Actually, judging by my nearly 3 million google results for ‘Fat Transexual Pay Sites’, those two aren’t mutually exclusive.

Sweet rolls of cock-hiding blubber, when I started this shitty blog (Never. Never. I repeat- never will that get old), I was amazed at how horribly bloated with crap the web has gotten because of blogs. Everyone and their strap-on wearing grandmother is pouring pablum onto the net, blogging about who gives a fuck. That’s why this plog was started, I wanted to see how I would do blogging about literal crap

Shitty Thing #412 About The Web

And I wanted to sell out doing it. And not just, ‘Well I think I can make a little money as a side project/hobby’ type of sellout. I wanted to sellout like ‘This is the most important thing in the world and gives my life purpose and I will do anything and everything including sell every ounce of self-respect, pride and decency for just one more dollar’.

You know the type of bullshit sellout mentality. I mean, have you seen these fucks with their shitty blogs and Adsense bullshit on it? Trying to make $14 a month from you stupid fucks who encourage them by reading blogs. They aren’t experts on the subject, they are barely literate, in fact most of them copy from Wikipedia and paste whole articles into their blogs and call it a post, but somehow they think they deserve a fifth a cent a click out of users because that’s how the way the web works. And when they do get that fifth of a cent a click their mind starts racing about to how to bump that up to twenty-one hundredths a cent a click. Bite my nut sack.

So in my quest to wrench every twenty-thirds of a cent out of this site I can, I stumbled upon affiliate marketing. Its like Amway, but …

No wait a minute, scratch that ‘but’, its exactly like Amway. Pyramid scheme, creates middlemen who really do nothing, not profitable for anyone other than those at the top, people with self-respect are embarrassed for you when you mention you do it and people who have or hope to have even modest success are very cultish about it. Yeah, no ‘but’ about it, affiliate marketing is Amway for the web.

Here’s a scary aside: I write these posts in Word, then copy them up to my plog. The first 2 times I typed ‘Amway’ (capitalized), the last time I typed ‘amway’ (uncapitalized). As soon as I typed the lower cased version Word put the red squiggle error line underneath it. I right clicked and it prompted me to change it to the capitalized version.

I might be in over my head with this one. Amway is entrenched. That’s how deep Amway’s reach is–its got to the Microsoft Word dictionary. Yeah, I might get fucked on this one. Well at least I will be able to have a post about the Cease and Desist I receive from them. Hopefully, they will take into consideration that I went back and dutifully followed Word’s advice and correctly capitalized their name.

Anyway, back to affiliate marketing assholes. As I was saying: They suck shit.

No one gives a fourth of a cum covered turd what you think, but please don't let that stop you from spreading your insightful wit to the world by commenting below. Or fuck, you're such a pussy-eating faggot you're probably interested in the rss feed of this shitty site. Oy vey.

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I'm not saying Being An Asshole doesn't have its place as a negotiation technique. My point's that Appeals For Empathy, Finding Common Ground and Exchanging Goodwill are hard to pull off when preceded by calling the other party a retarded cocksucking dumbfuck and promising to "rape the shit out of their ugly face".