porkjerky plogAss Deep In Team Bullshit
Jesus H. god damn fucking christ lord almighty cunt fuck shit piss whore.
Now, I know I say that a lot, but this time I literally mean it. And when I literally say ‘literally’, I literally mean ‘literally’. Literally.
Jesus H. god damn fucking christ lord almighty cunt fuck shit piss whore. Last week I got my big brown granny panties in a huge shriveled up menopausal bunch because every fucking thing in the word is shoehorned into being a team activity. Research papers, charity events, individual athletic events like track, tennis and bowling, even weight loss programs all get aggregated up, rolled into a ball and hammered into teams. Every fucking thing in the world is now done by a team. Every fucking thing.
That’s why I formed the Team Porkjerky.com Shitters. I figured if everything is better in teams, its high time we reinvented (don’t even fucking get me started on that cock sucking phrase) how we shit. No longer will crapping be a solitary endeavor, hidden behind doors, sealed off from the rest of the house. Now, we can all do it with pride, knowing that we have a group to back us as we squat down, push out our bowels, wipe ourselves off and in rare instances wash our hands when we are done. High fives all around.
Then, as I do, I decided to see how much I could disgust myself by being right. I googled the term ‘“blog team”‘. 476,000 results. I don’t know if I have mentioned this, but jesus H. god damn fucking christ lord almighty cunt fuck piss whore.
And then just because I love stomping on my own nuts, I clicked on a few links. I am not even going to bore you with the details. Just the overview: Loser Trekkie teams; dumbfuck housewife teams; literal retard caregiver teams; geeks and nerds sliced and diced into teams of unimaginable amount and boringitude; reams of teams composed of fat, uncoordinated losers who spend their days typing about sports other grown men play.
God damn it all to hell, I even found a bunch of blog teams who formed to help others blog.
I am at a lost for words, so let me repeat some that seem apropos:
Jesus H. god damn fucking christ lord almighty cunt fuck shit piss whore.
No one gives a fourth of a cum covered turd what you think, but please don't let that stop you from spreading your insightful wit to the world by commenting below. Or fuck, you're such a pussy-eating faggot you're probably interested in the rss feed of this shitty site. Oy vey.
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