porkjerky plogYou Should Have Seen The One That Got Away
She was the length of an oarsman’s row if she was an inch I tell ye. And thick as a turret to boot.
This was my Moby Dick. Holy crap. I first noticed this beast at 2 in the morning. Rumbling, tumbling, churning and convulsing. Oh, it would be fight for sure. A fight I don’t know if I was up to.
By 4 in the morning though I was buns deep in a fight with her and I knew one of us wouldn’t make it out alive. It was either me or the great brown beast, and I as sure as hell didn’t want it to be my time. So with one hand bracing on the port side and one against the starboard side of the porcelain vessel I was captaining, I thrust down and went to battle.
And when the mist settled and dawn was breaking, the beast had been run aground. Nary a tissue, not one was left upon the roll. Victory was mine and I would live to shit another day.
No one gives a fourth of a cum covered turd what you think, but please don't let that stop you from spreading your insightful wit to the world by commenting below. Or fuck, you're such a pussy-eating faggot you're probably interested in the rss feed of this shitty site. Oy vey.
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