porkjerky plogShit Winning Blog #1
Black eyes, cigarette burns, broken bones, born addicted to crack, white supremacy tattoos: None of those come close to signaling that you’re a horrible parent like having a fat kid.
So it is with a mediocre amount of fanfare that I bestow upon My Overweight Child Blog the 1st Random Time Interval Shitty Blog Award presented by Porkjerky.com. This award is given whenever the fuck I feel like it to blogs that far exceed the high standard of shittiness prevalent on the web today.
Congratulations and thank you My Overweight Child Blog for the cliched drivel you pore onto the web.
Having a fat kid means you’re failure as a parent for so many reasons; overall negligence of their health, apathetic towards spending any time with them doing activities other than watching T.V. and eating and the inability/indifference to properly teach them what constitutes a healthy lifestyle.
My Overweight Child Blog, though makes it seem like it’s a condition that can’t be avoided, something that’s a medical mystery, with top scientists still searching for a cure. In fact that’s basically their mission statement:
The My Overweight Child blog will help you keep informed about the latest research, findings, and resources available to parents of overweight or obese kids.
And it doesn’t fail. Here are just a few sample posts about the latest research, medical breakthroughs and trite advice it dispenses:
Overweight Children Healthcare Costs Higher
Too Much TV + Too Many Skipped Meals = Overweight Kids
Rope Jumping Helps Kids Stay Fit By Making Exercise Fun
Unhealthy Eating Patterns Can Lead To Obesity In Children
Again, congratulations to the inaugural winner of the Random Time Interval Shitty Blog Award presented by Porkjerky.com. While the Porkjerky.com Weight Loss Program is an effective tool in the meantime, hopefully someday, science will find a cure for childhood obesity. And when they do, you know My Overweight Child Blog will be on top of it. Then, with its reason for existence gone, hopefully it will shut down the next day.
No one gives a fourth of a cum covered turd what you think, but please don't let that stop you from spreading your insightful wit to the world by commenting below. Or fuck, you're such a pussy-eating faggot you're probably interested in the rss feed of this shitty site. Oy vey.
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