There Are Only: Shopping Days Until 9/11In the meantime, here are a few things you can do to entertain yourself and celebrate 9/11 at the same time:
Tell Someone About What's Ruining This Country
Yell At Mexicanish Looking People To Go Back To Their Own God Damn Country
Bitch About Gas Prices
Punch Anyone Who Says 'Al-Salam Alaikum' Square In Their Fucking Face.
Thank An Airport Security Guard For Keeping Us Safe From Fluids Of More Than 3 Ounces
Torture The Genitals Of Some Muslims
Write Hatemail To Me That Begins 'Now, I believe in free speech and all...but...'
Go Shopping For A New Hummer
Think Of The Children
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Happy 9/11 Everyone!!
In Honor Of This Festive Holiday...
Porkjerky.com Will Remain Dark
Like most people, ever since I was a kid 9/11 was one of my favorite holidays. The patriotism trees, coloring and hiding american flags, stuffing ourselves with bald eagle and all the trimmings, dressing up in bunting and scaring the neighbors into giving out candy and bringing merriment throughout our neighborhoods when we went pledging alliegiance.
But it seems somehow, 9/11 has gotten offtrack. It's become so commercial, a Hallmark holiday. Its more about outdoing each other with 9/11 gifts than it is about lighting candles, having moments of silence and reading names of a fucking list ad nauseum. It seems we are more concerned with decorating our houses and cars with flags, bows and those god damn magnetic ribbons than the things that are really important to this holiday--like military retribution to countries that had little or nothing to do with that day, fighting over the minutia of memorials that have yet to be built and spreading conspiracy theories. Where Did We Lose Our Way America?
This used to be a time when we took a day off from feeling self-righteous and entitled to everything in the world and devoted 24 hours to feeling sorry for ourselves and not understanding why the whole world didn't either. It used to be a time where we could naively claim to not understand why anyone would do such a thing to us. Now though, we seem to just be going through the motions.
So, in protest of what 9/11 has become and in honor of what 9/11 should be, I have brought Porkjerky.com dark, only this page is accessible. Tomorrow, like America, its glory will shine majestic. Today though reflect on what 9/11 truly means and do something to show you understand the true meaning of this holiday.
I implore you to go out today and punch a muslim, yell at anyone who looks near-Mexican to get the fuck out of our country, violently threaten someone who's worldview doesn't match the norm, make a hackneyed joke about the French and above all be an American--talk about freedoms, but don't actually assert or defend them.
Remember, this country is great because we keep saying its great. God bless.
Jason
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