Free Shit->Breakup Letter Generator

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Breakup Letter Generator

There's a time in all of our relationships when we find someone much hotter, wealthier and/or more endowed than who we are with. Let me ease these opportunistic times by providing a breakup letter. Select a reason, enter some info add a P.S. message and click the button. Then, just for fun, go get a restraining order or credit card in your ex's name. They're both fun and remarkably easy to get.

*These letters are mostly heterosexualcentric. Mainly, because as our laws, religions and televisions demonstrate, homosexuals do not have real relationships to breakup from, just casual sex ones. Multiple scientific studies have conclusively shown that they are just too busy for them with all the redecorating and child molesting they do. It's a medical fact.

Who's more piously self-righteous: An ex smoker or a suddenly strong-willed woman freshly out of an "abusive-relationship"? Oh jesus christ, what about a woman who quit smoking after she just got out of an abusive relationship? Holy fuck, I just theorized the most annoying cunt in the world.