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Current Mood: Shitty (sweet Jesus H. Fuck I am witty)

Humanity’s Crapacity

Ok, I’ve done a lot to advance the knowledge of microcrapology, letting everyone calculate how much they shit in a day, week, month etc. Now, let’s take it to the next level.

We’re going macro. Specifically, current daily macro–How much shit does the current human population of the Earth produce each day?

Of course, to get going, we are going to have to assume a couple of things. I know I know. We’ve all heard what happens when you assume right?—Yeah, you take the best information you have, extrapolate from there and use inductive reasoning to reach educated conclusions. (What? You heard something different? Oh yes, your shitty cliché is a lot better. My saying about ‘assume’ is just accurate, your’s rhymes. Fucking idiots.).

Assumption #1: I have it from a very reliable source, Population Reference Bureau, that I found after an exhaustive 15 second google search that the world population is about 6.2 billion. Let’s go with that.

Assumption #2: The dimensions of the average shit is 7 inches long, 1.5 inches in diameter and weighs .8 pounds. Its just an educated shitty guess. Like this entire plog, I pulled it out of my ass, but for the most part, its probably right.

Cumulatively: If laid end to end, we produce 57,081 miles of shit per day. The average circumference of the earth is 24,880 miles. Ergo, every 24 hours humanity produces enough crap to wrap around the earth at the equator and the prime meridian with enough left over to make a nice turd bow to at the Artic Circle.

Voluminously: Our collective daily crap could fill 504 Olympic sized swimming pools or ½ of the Great Pyramid.

Spatially: That’s enough crap to build a new 2 lane road from Seattle to Miami everyday or enough to cover Central Park 12 turds deep.

Massively: It’s equivalent in weight to about 36,000 M1 Abrams Tanks or 7 Empire State buildings.

Poetically: That’s a lot of motherfucking shit.

No one gives a fourth of a cum covered turd what you think, but please don't let that stop you from spreading your insightful wit to the world by commenting below. Or fuck, you're such a pussy-eating faggot you're probably interested in the rss feed of this shitty site. Oy vey.