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Current Mood: Shitty (sweet Jesus H. Fuck I am witty)

Award Winning Nutbag Blog

Yesterday, in my attempt to find a shitty blog that I was pretty sure existed, I got sidetracked when I stumbled on the web’s shittiest blog search site.

Today, I restruck out in search of the blog of my shitty dreams and was successful. I didn’t know if this exact blog existed, but was confident it did because I thought up the criteria for it. I call this my Stay Puff Marshmallow Man Shitty Blog Theory: If you can imagine a subject that would make a shitty blog (i.e. dogs so ugly they are cute blog, living with lactose intolerance blog, Idaho foster parents blog, etc.) it exists. Some douchesucker has already created that crappy blog and put it on the internet.

So today’s Porkjerky.com Intermittent Shitty Blog Award goes to Endued: A Blog About God and Life for realizing my shitty blog dream. I just knew such a blog existed, it was just a matter of searching for 5 minutes to find it.

Thank you Endued for being that shitty blog.

I thought that there was a blog out there that had both pictures of aborted feti and a post about how Dr. George Tiller’s murder was alright by them. So, in accordance with The Stay Puff Marshmallow Man Shitty Blog Theory, it did exist and it was just a matter of finding the specific blog that fulfilled my criteria. Sure enough, about halfway down the February 2009 Archive is a picture of a dead, cut-up baby and within hours of his murder they had a post up nearly rationalizing the Doctor’s assasination.

Delicious.

In real life, just like in Ghostbusters, the key to not confronting your fear that a shitty blog might exist, is to not allow the thought that it might enter into your consciousness. Unfortunately, I thought up something that would make a truly shitty blog and once you do that, not even crossing the streams of all our proton packs will rid it of the internet.

Congratulaions Endued on winning the I Forget How Many I Have Given Out Porkjerky.com Shitty Blog Award.

No one gives a fourth of a cum covered turd what you think, but please don't let that stop you from spreading your insightful wit to the world by commenting below. Or fuck, you're such a pussy-eating faggot you're probably interested in the rss feed of this shitty site. Oy vey.