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Current Mood: Shitty (sweet Jesus H. Fuck I am witty)

Cornholerows

Now, I’m not the type of guy to who likes to overly brag. I don’t casually work into every conversation how great I am (awesomely great), how huge my cock is (disgustingly, almost unusably huge) or how much of a great gift I am to the world (move over Christ, there’s a new JC in town). So, I don’t want to come off as too conceited when I mention this, but I have a pretty hairy asshole.

I know, I know. See that’s why I prefaced it the way I did. Every guy always brags about how hairy his asshole is—trying to show his virility, demonstrating his machismo and trying to impress his grandparents. And I don’t want to be that guy. But, the fact of the matter is, my asshole is quite hairy.

Very hairy.

Amazingly hairy.

Supremely hairy.

Romantically hairy.

Divinely hairy.

Hairy like a fox.

Omnipotently hairy.

I’m just saying. And I will back it up too. I will put my money where my mouth and asshole hair is. I am taking on all comers. Bring your asshole over to my place, we will compare hairiness and my sphincter will put yours to shame. Again, not conceited, just stating facts.

Of course I do realize the hairiness of my asshole and my pride in it raises some important questions. Namely, which I will leave unanswered as a creative exercise to you, is: How do I know my asshole is so hairy?

Further, how am I able to accurately make a comparative statement about the hairiness of my asshole to the average asshole?

No one gives a fourth of a cum covered turd what you think, but please don't let that stop you from spreading your insightful wit to the world by commenting below. Or fuck, you're such a pussy-eating faggot you're probably interested in the rss feed of this shitty site. Oy vey.